Here’s the situation. I signed up for the 23andme genetic testing service which used my saliva collected in their special vial to give me my maternal ancestry, genetic disease risk potential, and a host of other tidbits of information. The website has a tab in their nav bar for “paternal lineage” but as a girl I’ve got the wrong chromosomes for that.  As part of their research they ask that you fill out a bunch of surveys on family medical history, physical features, ancestry, etc. In addition to being able to tell their subjects interesting and often useful information about themselves, they have developed this robust community of people who can find others in similar circumstances or even, in many cases, distant cousins that they didn’t know they had! I have a good friend who’s gone through this process as well as one of her good friends so while I was initially skeptical, their experience proved quite fascinating.

This is all well and good. A really neat concept by a forward thinking company, founded by women, providing a unique service in an accessible format. Terrific. The two gals that recommended 23andme.com to me are well-educated, one’s doing her own form of genetic research, and confirmed the veracity of everything they received. Here is where it gets interesting. They each know their ancestry and family medical history so they were able to confirm the accuracy to me. I, however, know NOTHING in that regard. I’ve mentioned in much earlier blog posts that I was adopted through L.A. County, California, and barely have any information about my past let alone family tree research or any propensity to cancers, glaucoma, Alzheimer’s, ANYTHING. I might be setting my expectations too high, but I anticipate that whatever I get back will be wildly interesting to me. 

Despite the two reliable recommenders assuring me that everything they were told fits into what they know about their family histories, I am still a tiny bit dubious so I haven’t filled out any of their surveys yet. I don’t want to tell them I am so pale I’m transparent and had towhead blonde hair as a kid until they tell me that my blood line traces back to northern Sweden.

I turned in my very gracefully collected bottle of spit about two and a half weeks ago. All notices said that I’ll hear my results in four to six weeks. 10 minutes ago I got an email telling me my genetic profile is ready. I haven’t opened it, yet. The knowledge is irrevocable.

So…the hosts.  I have to give them props for acknowledging the silliness of them being chosen to appeal to the younger demo, and Anne Hathaway is a lovely, charming girl. But. I’m not sure why they made her co- host with the actor that played Log by Blammo on the Ren and Stimpy cartoons. Oh, wait, that log was actually animated. James Franco must be an amazing actor because being himself was less thrilling than the 125 hours that we didn’t see of Ralston just standing there in the cave would have been.

Thank you, Alec Baldwin for trying to make the intro montage entertaining. It’s always a treat when you show up. Maybe not for your kid, but for the rest of us, it’s a treat.

Randy Newman? Really? Again? Still? It’s the same goddam song every time.

Ahh, Reznor. He may look like a corporate tool these days, but I’m proud of him. And the Academy for going with it. They are almost forgiven for the Newman thing. Seriously. Randy Newman?

I’m a little torn about how I feel about Kirk Douglas. I love that he’s still able to be an active part of the community and it’s adorable that an elder statesman gets away with some of the crap he got away with (I did actually enjoy his stalling of the reading of the winner) but he did seem a little confused and completely disinterested in the cadence of the evening.

Eli Wallach, now that old dude was amusing. I don’t remember what he said, but I remember laughing.

Side note, it may have been hacky but I liked JT’s call back to KD’s stalling joke.

I missed the entire In Memorium section, which I usually watch, because I think I saw Celine Dion step up to the mic.  Way to ruin the potential for a beautiful montage, creative team.  Note to my friends and family, if you honor my shuffle off of this mortal coil with a Celine Dion rendition of  ANYTHING I will haunt you and not in a fun, Caspar-y kind of way. Think Paranormal Activity.

There were a couple of speeches that I liked. Melissa Leo because she dropped an F-bomb, and I’m super easily amused like that. Also, she looked genuinely surprised and disbelieving. Colin Firth because he’s all British and funny for a serious looking guy. Natalie Portman because she was classy and eloquent. The guy with the crazy hair that won for his live action short; and Sandy Bullock’s best actor tribute. I just want to hang out with that girl. I know there were others I enjoyed but I’m not typing this real-time. Which you can tell by the fact that it’s totally out of chronological order. 

Sadly, I haven’t seen several of the films that were up for awards but I still do plan to. I loved The Social Network, but didn’t really think it was best picture worthy.  I do plan to see The King’s Speech, True Grit, and the Fighter. Netflix just sent me Winter’s Bone today. I do have some work ahead of me and I’m looking forward to it.

Let’s discuss outfits. Hated Cate Blanchett’s enough to mention it. Loved some of Hathaway’s didn’t love others.  Could not take my eyes off of Mila Kunis’s chest trying to figure out what the lace bits that were clearly stuck on were.  Did Brolin and Bardem call each other before the show to make sure they were twinsies? And who tied Jude Laws tie? Someone that doesn’t really like him, I suppose.  Ms Bullock looked amazing, but I’ve kissed her ass enough for one night. Oh! And Jennifer Hudson? She is unrecognizable and fantastic.

Since when does Chuck Bartowski sing? Well, I’ll tell you. According to imdb, he’s been a song and dance man since he was six. Also, he was born in Louisiana. In my limited experience, all people from Louisiana are awesome.

I’ll close by saying that even though I haven’t seen The King’s Speech yet, I’m glad it won and I look forward to my screening of it. Soon, I hope. I think it’s ridiculous that there were 10 films up for it this year and while some of the competition was good, I suspect the right one won.

So, I last left off a couple (few?) weeks ago with the long-winded tale of my first tattoo. The first one, when you mean it, is always special even if it’s just flash when you are still in your teenage years.  I’ve retouched the color once, but I’d never cover it. My second and third, however, are both slightly embarrassing and I am fairly sure numero dos will get covered one of these days after other needle-y priorities are taken care of.

Flash backwards to 1991. I’d moved to Chico in February of 1990 and with just one tattoo, I fancied myself a member of that particular sub-culture so when a tattoo ‘convention’ advertised in nearby Paradise, I was all over it. The quotes are due to my understanding of much larger conventions, now that I’ve truly been around this block. My first couple were Ink Slingers in LA and I’ve been to the Body Art Expo in SF a few times, as well. But I digress.  Before I discuss my decidedly un-ruley second piece of work, I want to chat about this show for a minute. Now, children, let me take you back to the early 90′s. Body mods were just sort of starting to hit the mainstream but this truly is before the coeds were getting their little sorority letters on their inner ankles and butterflies on their upper ass.  It really was the realm of dirt bags, military guys, and rock stars, still. Considering that and the fact that the event was in Paradise, you can imagine how well 20-year-old me fit in, even with whatever crazy hair cut/color I was rocking at that time. Note, Paradise is lovely but this was a great opportunity for the tweakers from Cohasset to down from of their hill and up onto this one.  It was a heck of an adventure. One from which I still have the t-shirt. I’m not so much a hoarder, as someone who attaches sentiment to the dumbest shit possible and refuses to let those things go.  That retarded plastic rainbow slinky that I have sitting on my home office desk? It came from the trade show where I was inspired to shift my entire career. IT’S A 13 YEAR OLD PLASTIC BOOTH GIVE AWAY.  I have access to really nice booth giveaways, but that is the one I’ll keep until the day I die.

Anyway…I honestly can’t remember if I got my 2nd tat before or after the convention but I can tell you for sure I got it at a lady owned shop in Paradise, CA. New Creation Dermagraphics. So I thought, hey, this is novel, it’s all chicks, it’s almost beauty salon style, this will be classy! Maybe for some of the gals, it was, but not so much for me. Let’s start with my design. Which was shit. I was/am a big Zeppelin fan. I realize that’s trite, but there’s no escaping it. Because of that, my black cat that I had in Chico was called Zoso (ask your friend Googles if you are unclear) and I had this terrific idea that I’d get an image of a stylized black cat with Zeppelin’s Zoso symbol design tattooed under it. When it was fresh, it looked ok, but the outline on the Zoso was sort of dodgy and as soon as I got home I realized it was (still is) missing a whole key, final stroke of the calligraphy. Also, it didn’t take long at all for the yellow eyes to fade completely and the black in the cat to turn splotchy. Why did it all go so wrong, you may wonder? Well, added to the fact that I was still a newb, I learned as I was paying to leave that the gal that did my work was an apprentice. A goddamn apprentice. I realize my design wasn’t difficult at all, but a little informed consent would have been nice and that might have given me a head’s up that maybe I need to NOT defer to her as an expert. I do still have this piece on my right hip, just where I left it but it is most decidedly not legendary.

Let’s move on briefly to number three, shall we? This piece is just awful, but very important for two reasons. The design is dumb. It was my third piece, I knew I’d get more, and my friend Julie wanted to get her first piece so I thought, what the hell, I’ll just get some flash to bond with her over, and since I’m SUCH a veteran, I can afford to be a little cavalier about the whole process. I said out loud at the time, no big deal, if I hate it later, I’ll cover it up.  It’s just a heart and some viney bits, nothing to write a blog post about. HOWEVER, important fact about this piece number 1–it was the birth of the concept of my travel leg.  There are seven total locations represented on this ankle, now, but this one started it all  in lovely New York City in April of 1993. 

Important fact about this piece number 2, which almost makes it the coolest one I have despite being the 2nd ugliest–I got this tattoo in New York City when it was illegal to give or receive tattoos in New York City. From what I understand, tattooing was criminalized in 1961 due to a hepatitis outbreak in the City and wasn’t legalized again until 1997. So, my trip goes like this: We are in New York for the first time and have decided to bond over this tattoo plan. Terrific, we are in the greatest city in the world, there is bound to be a shop on every corner. And yet, no yellow pages, no information on America Online, nothing. We had already been to CBGB, or that would have been a great place to ask people. I had a relationship with the Gauntlet in San Francisco so I had the bright idea to ring the sister piercing shop in NYC because  SURELY they know where to point me.  That is where I received the horrible, horrible news that tattoos were straight up illegal in NYC and even if she knew of underground shops, wink wink, nudge nudge, she couldn’t tell me exactly where they were. Great, so now I was sure there were underground shops, but how does a dork like me find one of those? My memory isn’t 100% clear but I believe firmly that I found an ad in a tattoo magazine that only had a 212 phone number and no address. I recall having to jump through a couple of hoops to get the address and off we went to some shadey, unmarked store front in Queens that had mirrored windows so you couldn’t see inside at all. They guy that did the work looked like  Howard Stern circa early 90′s and smoked a joint the whole time. Why not? The dude was already going to get busted for his livelihood, may as well take on a potential drug charge at the same time!

Side note–Tattoo #3 was turned into Tattoo v3.1 in Austin, Texas around 2004 when I added some weird purple spiral things to the top and bottom of it. Trying to figure out what the hell I’m thinking 90% of the time is a great sport and I’m no good at it even when faced with hindsight so don’t ask.

There you have it. My most regrettable works are on display with some frequncy but they are chapters of my life and I may not be who I was at that time, but I’m mighty proud of my journey.  The next chapter doesn’t start until 1999 when I began work on the Japanese pieces on my back.  Wagahai wa neko de aru.

I usually say that I started when I was 18 but the more I recall the circumstances under which my parents discovered my first bit of ink, I was more likely 19. I honestly don’t know where it started for me. My family was fairly conservative, I don’t recall having friends with tattoos, although I did have friends that did a little skating and good music listening, but I just remember being in high school thinking when I’m of age, I’m getting a tattoo. I won’t give the year, but let’s just say, it wasn’t exactly an era when nice young ladies were hanging out with bikers and marines in tattoo ‘parlors’ to use the parlance of the day. Yes, it was the 40′s. 

Before goth was goth, I had it in my head that I wanted a black rose tattoo. I thought it would be deep and dark, while pretty at the same time. You know, something to reflect the teenaged depression of an upper-middle class California beach lifestyle (I know, I make myself barf now that I’m remembering it all).

So, it was November and I got the wild hair one night when I was living near San Diego State University. I found Avalon Tattoo, which I guess is kind of a big deal, now? I do not remember the name of the guy that did my work, but he was old school, to be sure. Most everyone in there was military, given it was San Diego, and I recall one guy asking me “don’t you think it’s going to hurt too much?” and I snapped back something about it being alright if he wants to chicken out, but he doesn’t have to project onto me (I took Psych 101, baby!). I chose some standard flash off the wall that came with a banner, and had him remove the banner. I was mighty tempted by the panther piece on the wall, and I thank god every day that I stuck with my original plan. I have little more recollection about the work itself. It was a whirlwind and a long time ago.

Thanksgiving weekend. My mom was lying down on the sofa, not well, which is why I think it was age 19. My feet were up on the coffee table, giving my supine mother a front row view of my exposed ankle when she turned her head. She asked “that’s not temporary, is it?” “Nope, it is not.” “BILL! Come and look at what your daughter did”. Pop came and looked at it, asking me “why didn’t you just get a battleship across your chest?” “Because, dad, that’s not pretty”.

That was the last of it. I swear if it was any of the other kids, there would have been a lot more conversation but the young, weird one gets away with murder. At least gets away with questionable decisions that affect no one else, anyway.

I still have that black rose, in fact I touched up the color a few years ago to match work I’ve built around it. it may not be beautiful, but it’s a chapter of my life and I celebrate it. Stay tuned for the next installation which is about the only piece of work I have that I will definitely cover up as soon as I prioritize it.

I know it’s kind of super trendy right now, maybe it’s Ellen Page’s fault, maybe not, I don’t know, but I do know that I have had an interest in the sort of far away, vague notion of roller derby for a few years now. Once upon a time I looked up local leagues, but that was before the Silicon Valley Roller Girls existed and I simply didn’t give enough of a damn to actually head to some geographically undesirable location to try something I had no clue I could even do.  Plus, I knew NO one that was involved it in so it was easy for me to just sort of push it off as a flight of fancy. Like “Gee, I’d love to fly to the moon one day”.

Cut to April of this year. I’m sitting in one of my local bars chatting with friends when one of the regulars rolls by and offers to sell tickets to an SVRG bout for his wife. What, what ,WHAT? Not only is there a local league but I know people (sort of) that are involved in it! Holy crap, yeah, I wanted to go. So a friend I was with bought tickets and I went to my first live roller derby bout. There were several folks there that I knew from the bars, we drank PBR, and rooted for the twoSVRG  teams of super badass chicks that were skating. From the minute I stepped inside the rink, I wanted in. I could not stop daydreaming about being out there in fishnets and booty shorts, skating my heart out, throwing elbows, but in a legal manner, and frankly, enjoying being on a team of awesome ladies.

I went to two more local bouts to finish out the season. At the last one, one of the bar buddies introduced me to his lady, who is on the team. I said to her “I aspire to be out there with you guys” and she said “DO IT!” and encouraged me to reach out to their recruiting person. Turns out, my timing was spot on. I reached out to them in the middle of September and they told me they had a boot camp starting on the 3rd of October. The catch was, there are like 300 ladies on the list but they only have 50 slots. On top of those 50 slots, priority is given to girls for other various reasons, so it’s sort of a tight race. Thankfully, when it comes to using the interwebs, I’m super speedy. When the ‘sign up now’ email came out, I was on it within a few minutes. They ‘sold out’ in three hours. 

And here we are on October 3rd. I just had my first boot camp workout of 16 (eight weeks, two times a week). Let me tell you, it was a roller-coaster. Pulling into the parking lot of San Jose Skate (that’s Aloha Skate, to you old-schoolers), I was full of anxiety. I didn’t know any of the ladies, I literally haven’t skated anywhere but in my house since I was about 11, and I am not so great at walking into something where I have no idea what to expect. The first 10 minutes were not awesome. I thought I got there early, but the place was already full with a lot of girls already skating around the rink. And they looked skilled. My first few rolls around the rink were NOT skilled. I felt so uncoordinated and like the only one that was shaky. I learned very quickly I’m in some good company, but you know….

After some warm up laps we did some stretches and introduced ourselves. There were about five of us that said we’ve been skating for all of 10 minutes, a couple of girls that said they’ve been skating for a couple of weeks, but most had said months or years. As we got more into our drills and stuff, there was one poor gal who had CLEARLY never been on skates. Like the five of us that said “10 minutes” had obviously had some residual skills leftover from when we were 10, but this girl was about as rookie as you can get. And I totally applaud her. She was kind of my hero for the day.

We spent the two hours getting instruction on various basic techniques, falling to your knee, t-stops, cross-overs, and simply skating. As a tall girl, I was constantly told to keep low, bend at the knees and lean over. My quads and my lower back are displeased. I’m not very good at most of the drills, but all I need is practice. The good news is, I kept upright…

…until the very end. We had 10 minutes left in practice and they let us self select which break-out group we wanted to be in. I chose t-stops because I just couldn’t get the feel quite right. My very first push out to the cones, I have no idea what happened but I slammed completely backwards, elbows first, no biggie I had pads on, then my upper back, knocked the wind out of me, and then my head bounced off the ground. Of course my helmet was on, but I hit hard enough that a few girls went “OOH!! Are you alright?!” It took me a second to speak, I got up, and skated to the side, then my head started spinning. And it kept spinning for a short while. I skipped two sets of the t-stop drill but I never went to sit down and as soon as I stopped being dizzy, I got right back out there. My first set was tentative, I was scared, but then I actually got pretty comfortable with them. Now, at home, my head and neck kind of ache, but it’s light enough that it will pass soon.

Our next workout is Tuesday and while I’m a little nervous, still, I am looking forward to it! It was hard work, I was sweating like a runner, and I devoured my lunch afterwards, but I’m really excited to improve my skills and potentially try out for the league in eight weeks!!

Middlesex, by Jeffrey Eugenides–I have not read The Virgin Suicides (although I did see the film) and I’m about 8 years behind the curve on Middlesex, but I now officially wish that Eugenides had written more novels. 

Middlesex refers both to the street that the protagonist’s family lives on outside of Detroit as well as the fact that s/he is intersexed due to some unfortunate genetic cocktails in her family history. Raised as a female until she can no longer ignore that she’s not experiencing puberty like other girls and she realizes a growing attraction for women, she lives the remainder of her life as a man, which is actually her chromosomal gender. 

This novel takes us through three generations of a Greek-American family starting with their immigration to the United States. It covers a few significant 20th century events and offers an in-depth explanation of the physical and emotional experiences of someone with Cal’s particular condition. While all of those things were interesting and enough to hold my interest, it is Eugenides’ turn of phrase that kept me keenly interested the whole way through. His level of detail in many cases was brilliant and he kept me laughing in places I didn’t expect to be amused. If any of this subject matter interests you, or if you are simply looking for a great novel that rises above the fun books that they make tv shows out of (which I also love) I really recommend this book. Enjoy!

Easy A–This was an adorable homage to John Hughes films that I was delighted was as good as I expected. On the surface, it actually paid honor to Nathaniel Hawthorne’s, The Scarlet Letter, but I think that was just the vehicle the filmmaker used to relive the movies he grew up with.

To start with, I’m a big fan of the stars of this movie. I love everything I’ve seen Emma Stone in, Thomas Hayden Church is pretty great, Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tucci as Olive’s parents were beautifully written and played, and I actually like the gal that played her friend, Alyson Michalka who is also in Hellcats.  Getting back to the parents, their dialogue was completely unbelievable, but so well delivered and fit with Emma Stone’s character so well, that I was happy to buy in. I loved them.

There were a couple of turns in the story that I didn’t expect and the music was a lot of fun. Again, recommend!

Catfish–If you plan to see this movie, don’t read any further. I won’t give anything away, really, I hate spoilers, but I am all kinds of ready to debunk the dumb ads.  This was a really good movie. As a documentary of one man’s quest to find the woman he fell in love with over the internet, it was really well done. In many cases they used simple consumer cameras, which gave it a homegrown feel, they incorporated a lot of familiar internet graphics (Google maps, Facebook’s look and feel) which was very clever and well done. What this movie isn’t, is “the Hitchcock movie that Hitchcock never made”. It was not suspenseful or a thriller in any way. The outcome becomes obvious before it should if it’s going to be suspenseful and I was never on the edge of my seat. However, I was interested in the who’s the what’s the where’s and the why’s. It ends up exploring the fallibility and neediness of humans and really turned my opinions about a couple of the characters from when I first met them to the end of the film. I really liked it, but it is a particular sort of movie so you ought to be in the mood, I think. If you want to see something like Rear Window, adjust your expectations.

I wanted to start blathering on about some of the new fall shows, but I’m tired of ‘hearing’ myself talk and I need to get to work!

Yes, I am so aged that I vividly remember even life before Fox. I remember how exciting it was there was going to BE a fourth network. Maybe just to me.

Anyway, even tho some CW shows started last week, and there are  a couple of NBC shows starting this week, next week is the mother lode of all new 2010-2011 shows.  As I am one of two local experts on the topic that I know, I can not help but give my opinion. I’m going to kind of ignore some of the current standards. HIMYM, BBT, CSIs, Greys, The Office, SVU, etc. Those have been discussed  ad nauseam by myself and pretty much everyone else that has access to American television.

2nd season shows I love:

• Parenthood-Lauren Graham’s character isn’t all that different from Lorelai Gilmore, but I don’t really mind that because I liked LG and the rest of the show is so well done. The writing and acting are good, the actors’ chemistry works, and it really makes me wish I lived near my family.  It’s not perfect, but I’m very glad it’s back. It starts tonight.
• Glee-I am sure there is an anti-Glee subculture out there because this show has become so beloved, but for good reason.  The writing is terrific, the music infectious, and Sue Sylvester (Jane Lynch) steals every one of her scenes. Last season’s episode with Neil Patrick Harris almost made my head explode from too much awesome.
• Modern Family-It’s been a while since I’ve enjoyed a freshman sit-com so much right out the gate.  For example, it took me a couple of eps to love Community despite my TRO-worthy crush on Joel McHale, but Modern Family is brilliant from opening sequence to closing production logo screens.  Chuck Lorre can suck it. 
• The Good Wife-I’ve been dismayed by the title of this show since I first heard about it last summer.  It does not do Julianna Margulies’ character justice as she is SO much more than the publicly humiliated, fallen politician’s wife that she portrays. A clever attorney in her own right, made to go back into the workforce due to her husband’s misdoings, Alicia Florrick is human, interesting, and, dare I say, believable??
• Castle-This was a mid-season add at the end of 2008-2009 so it’s not exactly a sophomore show, but close. Yes, it’s another cop procedural but Nathan Fillian as Castle is wonderful. He’s appropriately dreamy, funny, smart, and vulnerable. His police partner, Stana Katic more than holds her own against his charms and antics.
• Cougartown-I KNOW! I’m just as surprised as anyone at how great this show is. Despite Courtney Cox.  Turn your brain off, pour a glass of wine, and enjoy. These people are hilarious even with Courtney’s over-acting.

New shows I’m looking forward to:

• Hawaii Five-0: The original started before I was born and I never got into reruns so I have no purist tendencies here. All I know is I like Hawaii, I like cop shows, and I like the lead actors. I really, really hope they handle it right.
• Running Wilde-As far as I’m concerned everything Will Arnett touches turns to gold.
• Lone Star-On the surface, it seems like a new idea. At least an old idea dressed up to look like new. I’ll be keen to see if they can wind their way thru the web of deceptions cleverly or lazily.
• The Whole Truth-What can I say? I’m a sucker for legal dramas. This one follows each case from both the defense and prosecution’s POVs. Might be an interesting way to keep the audience guessing….
• My Generation-This one takes the faux-documentary idea of some recent films into the silver screen. The premise is that a group of high school seniors were filmed in the year 2000 and revisited 10 years later. Having passed my 20 year reunion not terribly long ago, thoughts of where I thought I’d be vs where I am are top of mind so I am looking forward to how these characters shape up.

There are several others that I’m recording, both new and old, that I just don’t think need mentioning. They either aren’t new enough for me to call them out even though I love them (Brothers & Sisters, for example) or they are new, but I’m not super excited yet (Blue Bloods-might be good, but it’s a family of cops and lawyers-whee). I will record L&O-LA but I sort of resent that they’ve done that and I have a feeling it won’t make it. I loved Dick Wolf’s short-lived Conviction, and it failed after only 13 episodes. I just don’t see the translation to LA working, but I’ve been wrong before.

Finally, sadly, I think The Good Guys, is a terrible show.  It’s poorly written and a waste of Colin Hanks’ time. I’ve heard people praise it, but I just don’t see it and, frankly, my tv tastes do not run all that particular. I watch most of the CW shows, for Pete’s sake so a show has to really suck for me to think it’s no good.

If I didn’t actually get out and live a life, I think my television obsession might be really unhealthy, but thanks to multiple dvr’s and not having any kids, I manage to cram in plenty of ‘healthy’ tv watching time while I read, work-out, cook, clean, etc.  Now, leave me alone, I’m watching the Rizzoli and Isles season finale which is based on books that I actually READ by the way…

Ok, so where was I. Ah, yes, I had mentioned Jerpoint Abbey but didn't really expound on it. I haven't taken too many of these places up on their guided tours and I really ought to. The lovely Margaret that did the one at Jerpoint was so informative and engaging. she explained the statues and carvings that I never would have understood without her. It was me, an older English couple and a family of 6 that I think were Welsh. Margaret made it interactive by quizzing us but I knew NONE of the answers. Like there were carvings of the apostles and each carving had something that represented their story but I was clueless. One guy had a wheel and one of the kids was all "oh, he has a wheel because he did blah blah blah". I did end up knowing one answer though. It was a carving of a deadly sin which was clearly gluttony but it stumped the smart folks. So I blurted it out and we were all very proud of me. It IS after all my favorite deadly sin.

After Jerpoint I drove to New Ross to tour a famine ship but it was very crowded, you have to go on a tour, the next one was in 30 minutes, and I was super hungry. I wandered around the town a wee bit and had lunch.

From New Ross I had to decide if I wanted to head to the coast for Hook Head or go to the Waterford Crystal factory. Now, I don't really give two hoots about the crystal but it is iconic and it might have been interesting. Based on a couple of factors, I chose the former and boy, did I choose wisely.

So, I drove down to Hook Head, which is the site of the world's oldest working lighthouse. I LOVED this day. The drive was so beautiful down this narrow peninsula (you could see the water on both sides) that ended at this terrific rocky coast line. The route from New Ross took me on all of these small, gorgeous, windy roads, but no one was on them with me so it was just a dream drive. Only would have been better in a sports car. In fact, it was on this road that I was thinking I shoud rent a motorcycle for a day. Looked into it and it's like 90 Euro. Not worth it since I'm also paying for a car. Anyway, the minute I see the sea I realize this was the right plan. The sky was blue, the day was warm, the ground was green and the water was brilliant. I could have stayed at the Hook Head point for hours. Black craggy rocks, super cool light house, crashing waves. Just wonderful.

The drive back to Kilarney from Hook Head was on a more direct, wider route road. I'm telling you, that Garmin broad is making educated decisions. I'm sure of it.

For dinner in Kilarney I ate at Kyteler's Inn. It's a really cool medievil building with a rich history. Dinner was good, not great, but the Smithwick's I drank due to its being brewed a block away, was terrific.

Well, heck. now I'm two days behind. I've got yesterday, Rock of Cashel, Cahir Castle, Kinsale; and today, Jameson, Cobh, and Charles Port. I'm already forgetting so much that I experienced on Hook Head day that I hope to catch back up with myself.

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Today was a good day, but before I start in on that, I had a memory from yesterday.

My niece just asked me on Facebook where my picture of Bono was and it triggered my brain. When I was about halfway to Kilkenny from Dublin I felt brave enough driving to actually turn on the radio. I shit you not, the first song I heard after clicking past two talk stations was U2. I listened to a couple more songs to make sure it wasn't an all U2 all the time station and it wasn't, so the coincidence cracked me up.

I got a late start to the day, today. I wanted to sleep in to get over jet lag and enjoy a leisurely Irish breakfast in my hotel. The breakfast part, worth it. I didn't actually leave the hotel until about noon so by the end of the day, I had to make a 'which site do I go to' choice and you will come to see, I made the right one.

So, the first place I went was Kells Priory, which is a ruined Augustine Abbey that dates from the 12th-16th century. I reckon all of the abbeys I will go to in this trip fell away in the mid 1500's because Henry the XVIIth did away with them. Kells Priory is, interestingly, attached to the town of Kells which I just fell in love with. It's tiny, and cute, and the two residents that I interacted with were so genuinely nice.

So the priory is a ruin that you can able around in with just about no restrictions and no fee. It rained on me this morning when I was there but I was practically alone (save for the sheep across the street) and the grey backdrop was kind of appropriate. It's not like a ruiined monastary is a happy, buzzing joyful place, anyway.

Getting to this site is when I decided that, no, the Garmin lady in my car isn't stupid, she knows exactly what she's doing but she messes with me on purpose. I need to go into settings and see if there is a "screw with a tourist" button that is ticked instead of "fastest route" or "avoid tolls".  One of my guidebooks told me to take N10 and turn right. The Garmin lady made me take R697. Let me tell you a little something about N's vs R's. An N is a national road. Sometimes wide, sometimes narrower, but in my experience, quite management even when small. N10 is wide, one lane in each direction, turn lates, shoulders, center lines and divides. R697 is about 1.5 lanes wide, total, no center line or really markers of any kind, and it's lined with walls or shrubs. This is what I drove this morning before I was comfortable driving. I hated that Garmin lady.

I have learned to love that Garmin lady. The R's are so much more intersting than the N's and I pass such little traffic that the narrow bits aren't really much of an issue. They run through cute towns and past these gorgeous expansive estates and farms.

Next I went to Jerpoint Abbey. Same story, a ruined abbey, same time frame, same reason it fell away. the difference is that this one was Cistercian and is an Office of Pubic Works facility so it's managed by the national government. I took a nice guided tour that really brought the place to life for me. This site was actually not on my original list of things to see but a friend recommended it on FB last night and I'm so glad I went!!

It's almost 1am here and I want to get up at 7 to get a full day in. So, I'll leave it off here but with some reminders for myself. (this really is my travel diary for me, so forgive me if I talk to myself from time to time).

Jerpoint, New Ross, route to Hooks Head, Hooks Head, drive home, Waterford.

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Hi ya'll! As I type this I'm streaming The IT Crowd on UK's Channel 4 on demand because I'm finally in the right region to do so!! I think they are showing season 4 in IFC at home but this is more exciting for me.

Anyway, writing in a travel journal is so passe but my memory is swiss cheese so I will use this venue for my travelouge for me. Anyone else who reads it, feel free to comment!

When I landed in Dublin the reality of what I'm doing smacked me in the face. I'm looking forward to the solitude and spending two weeks site seeing, or not, sleeping, or not, eating, or not, solo. But I think it might end up being more challenging than I expected it to be. Day one almost down, and I'm happy as a clam, but we shall see how the weeks progress!

So, after someone crop dusted our passport control line (they were apparently not feeling well AT ALL), I finally made it to the rental car place. Anyone that has been anywhere in my proximity for the last four weeks knows that driving in this country has pretty much terrified me. Several people said "you'll be fine!" and I was even given the advice to not get Sat Nav because it's almost more fun to get lost. I realized on the plane that everyone that told me "you'll be fine!" either had another person with them acting as navigator or were they were the co-pilot. That's when I decided to spring for the Garmin. Side note, on my way from Dublin to Kilkenny, I became fairly certain that the lady that lives inside of my Garmin unit and tells me where to go does not know what the fuck she is talking about.

Anywho…the good news is, my car is very familiar to me and easy to manage. The bad news is it's because it's a bloody Hyundai. I fly all the way to Ireland just to get put into a Hyundai Accent.

And yes, driving on the left is a scary project, but not as bad as I thought it would be. My first turn out of the airport parking lot I started to go the wrong way (to the right) in a circle but that has been my only real screw up. I'm drifting a wee bit to the left on the motorway, which occasionally pops me onto the 'wake up' scored portion of the road, but it's really not so bad.. When I drove into Kilkenny, I was on crowded narrow streets negotiating turns, bicyclists, and baby carriages. I'm still nervous, but I almost really enjoyed my last roundabout. I do wish they actually put street names up somewhere, anywhere, but so far I've been able to wing it even after shutting the dumb Garmin lady off.

My original plan to take a long 5-6 hour siteseeing route from Dublin to Kilkenny and thank GOD I talked myself out of that one. I ended up in a straight shot for an hour twenty down the east side and my hotel room was ready at noon.

Kilkenny the town is cute. I like it. Little streets, loads of pubs and restaurants, and lots of old mixed in with the new (which is my favorite part of all European cities, anyway). I reckon I'm super jaded because my tour of Kilkenny Castle just wasn't that great. Most of the displayed furnishings and soft goods were from more recent eras and I come here to find more ancient or medieval historical references. There was one tiny display of mannequins in the basement that were wearing the super old tyme chain-mail protective gear and all I thought looking at them were that they were so EMO. Skinny pants, low slung wide leather belts…..

After having my first, for reals, deliciously amazing Irish poured Guinness, I toodled past the Smithwick's brewery, built in 1710 on the ruins of a much older abbey (that's more like it!) to the St Canice's cathedral, whose existing structure dates back to the 1200's. I couldn't get into Smithwick's, but the cathedral was lovely except for them setting up for some show. It was crawling with a/v guys and anvil cases.

BTW, Irish cows look MUCH happier than California cows. I've driven past Harris Ranch too many times.

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